In a study titled “Hedonic Consequences of Social Comparison: A Contrast of Happy and Unhappy Individuals”, researchers Sonja Lyubomirsky and Lee Ross asked people to teach children simple maths.
The people were divided into 2 groups.
For some, after they had taught the children, they were told ‘good job’. For others, in addition to being told they had done a good job, they were also told that other participants had done a better job.
After receiving feedback, the two groups of participants were asked to rate how happy they felt about their job performance.
Unsurprisingly, those who received the extra information in the form of comparison to an alternative group were less happy than those who were just told they did a good job.
My key takeaway is this: Don’t build your happiness on things that change. If you’re hell-bent on comparing yourself with others, you’d find that there’s always going to be someone wealthier, prettier, or more knowledgeable. If you must compare, compare yourself with where you’re coming from and where you’re headed to. Remind yourself: The story isn’t over yet!